(Prologue) Monologue of the fallen harem protagonist
–Where in the world did I go wrong?
What did I do wrong?
I still can’t forget the scene from that night.
After confessing my feelings to my childhood friend Shiho, getting interrupted by Nakayama, and finally getting dumped, I headed to an empty place to be alone.
Perhaps that place was a storeroom. In the shadow of a prefab shed that looked like a warehouse, I was nodding off, hiding myself.
I was shocked that my childhood friend, my first love, had rejected me.
I was also frustrated that the person I loved had been taken away from me by Nakayama, an ordinary man with no special qualities.
I felt miserable.
I wanted to heal myself as much as possible and I was left alone….. Fate is cruel.
That’s when those guys came.
The ones who came to avoid being seen were Shiho and Nakayama.
They didn’t notice me.
They probably only saw each other.
The scene at that time was very shocking.
Shiho was staring at Nakayama with a bright red face.
She had always been expressionless, but now she looked like a maiden in love and was hugging Nakayama.
Shiho could only see Nakayama.
She used to be sensitive to the presence of others, she used to notice me wherever I was and look at me, but …… now, she was so absorbed in Nakayama that she could not perceive me hiding.
And they were whispering their love to each other.
Since there was a little distance between us, I could not hear what they were saying to each other. However, the word “love” was interspersed throughout their words, so they must have become lovers.
As proof, Shiho kissed Nakayama on the cheek.
I could not forget that scene even after hours had passed….
“Why … why …… is it Nakayama?”
A moaning voice leaks out. I am alone in my room, so I am not talking to anyone. This is just me talking to myself.
The truth is, I wanted to scream.
If I opened the window and raised my voice, I am sure it would be heard in Shiho’s room right in front of me.
Her room is very close. It is only about a meter away from my window. So, if I wanted to see her, I could see her anytime I wanted to.
I was closer to Shiho than anyone else.
She was my childhood friend and the first person I fell in love with. I wanted to remain the person she loved for a long time to come…….!
‘I’m not good with you.’
When Shiho said that to me, I didn’t know what was going on anymore.
I can’t say it myself, but there are a lot of girls around me. So I guess I’m not the uncool one by any means.
At least compared to Nakayama, there is no reason to lose.
Nakayama is more ordinary and boring than me. There is nothing that Nakayama has that I don’t.
So why ……?
“If Nakayama is good enough for you, why not me? Am I really that much of a loser? Shiho …… tell me, what am I missing …… damn it.”
I don’t know what Nakayama has that I don’t.
I don’t know why Nakayama is good and I am bad.
……I always thought I was just an average person.
I have no special qualities, but there is nothing wrong with me, and I am proud that I am not someone to be disliked.
As proof of this, there were many girls who became friends with me.
Moreover, some of them even confessed their feelings to me. I thought I was not a bad person……!
“I don’t get it anymore…….”
Nodding, I close my eyes.
My confidence is gone.
I didn’t know how to treat the girls who talked to me.
I was afraid that no matter what I said, they would hate me like Shiho does.
Oh dear, …… what a despicable person I am.
Because of Shiho, I will never be able to be confident in myself again.
Huh, that’s boring.
This is just like a mob character.
It’s so stupid.
I’m just me. I don’t want to be a mob character even if it kills me.
I want to make him pay back.
I want to show Nakayama, the guy who ridiculed me, that I can win.
I want to show him how superior I am.
I want to show him that people like me are not people to be made fun of by people like him.
Someday, I want to somehow show him …… how it’s done.
That’s what I strongly thought.